So, we have all of these vacation pictures and videos and writings, but then Mass Effect 2 came out and everything is on the BACK BURNER until I DEFEAT THE COLLECTOR MENACE AND SAVE THE GALAXY. AGAIN.

That should take me a few more days.

I started a new video series called TAKE A HIKE. I just turn on the video recording and take a walk. Here are the problems with this concept:

1: I am walking and the video always looks like it was taken from the back of a rodeo bull.

2: I screwed up the compression. I was actually not going to post this video because it looks so yucky, but we’re about to leave for Thailand for 2 weeks, so. I may as well.

TAKE A HIKE 3 from Scott Stephan on Vimeo.

TAKE A WALK 4: Thailand Boogaloo.

Bibimbap is my default lunch/dinner/breakfast of choice. It’s about $3.50 for a an enormous bowl of rice with mixed vegetables, hot pepper paste and a fried egg, gently touched with sesame oil and seaweed. Like PB&J, it’s just one of those things that works, each flavor in perfect harmony with the others. I’ve payed a lot more money for food a lot clunkier than this. It’s a dish that makes you feel stupid for ever paying more than $3.50 for food.

So I was a little bit bummed when this showed up in the New York Times:

Excuse the weird grammar, the casual Korean and the phrase “customers of funerals”, it just flops. It’s a fine example of how Korea is generally over thinking it’s global efforts. This could not have been a cheap ad, so who forgot to run it by a native English-speaking copywriter? Also, why Bibimbap and not Samgyupsal? Why a dish of mixed rice and foreign ingredients and not, well, meat on a grill? Like a lot of Korean things, there plenty of head scratching moments in this ad.

Anyhow, if you can find it, go for it. There’s a Bibimbap place called Bap on 9th Avenue in between 55th and 54th street. It’s hardly authentic, but it is delicious.

I wrote this for a friend who is coming in a few weeks. I figured it was relevant:

Drinking is like. The national pasttime. Now that it’s winter, eveyrone drinks inside, but in Spring and Summer, after like 10, EVERYONE is drunk. You’ll see these business guys in $1,000 suits puking their guts out, passed out in bushes. Koreans dont just drink, they drink until they puke and blackout. Just now Koreans are starting to realize the dangers of alcoholism, but it’s still not really viewed as a problem. You can get booze ANYWHERE. You can also drink outside, but culturally it’s appropriate to keep it to a minimum. As long as you’re not making a huge deal out of it, you’re okay. Most convenience stores will put out folding tables and chairs and you can pop inside, get some booze and drink at a table. This is a great way to meet people, they love to see white people enjoying Korean culture. Most C-Stores also sell little dixie cups for 5 or 10 cents a pop. I always keep a few on hand to offer to passerby or people at other tables. They’ll love you and start buying you snacks and all kinds of stuff from the store. Most street food vendors also have a small sitting area and serve booze, too.

Re: Booze. There are maybe 4 brands of beer here: Cass, Hite, Max and OB. All 4 taste like shit and are 3% alcohol. OB also makes some knock-off beers that are supposed to be like Corona or Guiness or something. They still suck ass. More expensive bars will usually have Heineken or Guiness, but at eye popping prices. I know of ONE microbrewery in Seoul. Most Koreans drink Soju, a rice liquor. It tastes like Vodka but sweeter. It’s also not made from rice anymore and is subject to any number of terrifying urban legends. It’s a buck for a bottle and 1 bottle will get you fucked up. Beer is mostly a “side-drink” for Soju. There’s also Magkolei (Mah-koh-lee), sometimes called Nongju. I don’t know why some places call it by a different name, no one can tell me what the difference is. Anyway, it RULES. It’s like milky white and kind of sweet and is apparently pretty good for you. It has a lot of vitamins or something. It used to be a peasant drink, but it’s really in vogue in urban areas and with younger generations. You’ll love it. There are special Magkeolli restaurants where they serve it with pindaetok, which are Korean pancakes, usually with seafood or kimchi. Good stuff. You can also get it in bottles at any C-Store. Sometimes it’s flavored, but I think I like it straight the best. There;’ this artsy/indie party once a month and some guy there brings his Mom’s homemade Makgoeli and it will get you drunk. Major.

Re: Beer, WIkipedia has this to say: “The South Korean beer market is dominated by the three major brands: Cass, Hite, and OB. Most restaurants and bars will only have one on tap, as they are largely regarded as similar in taste and price (they are mostly brewed from rice). Foreign beers are available but are generally expensive – generally at least ₩8,000 and as much as ₩15,000 for a pint of Guinness in downtown Seoul mainly due to the heavy taxation on import beers, which is 100% opposed to 20 to 30 percent on other types of alcoholic beverage. Microbreweries are starting to appear, and this area of the market is showing increasing signs of sophistication. Unfortunately, due to the law requiring 30 billion Korean Won capital for commercial sales, it is not possible to buy microbrewery’s beer off the shelf. Of all Korea’s mass produced beers, only Hite’s Max Prime brand contains 100% barley malt.”

Everything after Christmas:

Well, we did Christmas and you saw the pictures of that. New Year’s was, to be diplomatic, was a mixed-bag. We decided to go skiing! At this point it is important to know that I have never been skiing. But every Winter Mary begs and begs and I always manage to put it off until the temperatures rise to something more survivable. This year the invitation come from somewhere outside, Megan’s co-worker Rachel who, for some reason, finds us not only tolerable but entirely preferable.

So, after work we all packed into the back of Rachel’s boyfriend’s car and headed off to, uh. Somewhere. It was 4 hours away, which was just as well. We all took little car naps and watched movies on our iPods and generally enjoyed the now entirely alien concept of a long car ride. I haven’t been inside of a car that’s not a cab for months, let alone packed into one for a long trip. I know my parents probably came to fear long trips and I sort of hated them at the time, but I missed them in some deep way. You hate the trip but it’s ultimately just a signifier for going somewhere, usually somewhere fun. A change of pace, at least.

We got there around 11 and almost immediately packed back into the car to catch some fireworks down at the resort. New Year’s! I spent much of the fireworks show huddled as deeply into my jacket as possible. I hate the cold. Hate the cold. Hate cold. We got back around 1 and Rachel’s other friends had arrived. And a moment of cross-cultural awareness began: On New Year’s, Koreans start cooking and drinking somewhere around 1:30 AM. By 3 AM, being good company, we are all severely drunk and completely stuffed. What meal is it when you start eating around 2 AM? Early breakfast?

Anyway: Up around 10:30 because checkout was at 11:15 and off to the mountain. Cross-Culture Awareness moment #2: Lots and lots and lots of Koreans go skiing on New Year’s Day. Now, I’ve never been skiing, but saddled in something like 3 coats, 2 pains of gloves, 3 pairs of pants, 2 scarves and a hat, holding a pair of skis and 2 poles and waiting something like 90 minutes to get up to the top of the mountain should have been a sign that things were maybe going a little off-schedule. I had managed to rouse a pretty good mood, though. Our prior sports attempts had actually gone pretty well: I became an avid bike rider and a reasonably good ice skater. I was hoping that skiing would turn out the same. I had a lot of time to mull this over. Going up the top I began to entertain a ridiculous fantasy of becoming a ski instructor. My imagined-prodigious talent would surely carry me through.

Let me sum up the experience thus: If it took 90 minutes to get up the mountain, it took us the remaining 3 hours of daylight to get down. I am not good at skiing. I will never be a ski instructor and, in fact, I will probably never be a skier, either.

You may have heard we had a spot of snow. The biggest spot in SIXTY SEVEN YEARS. Which makes it sound like we got FEE AND FEET OF SNOW IN A MIGHTY BLIZZARD. It was more like, I don’t know, 10 inches? Korea doesn’t get a whole lot of snow.

Anyhow, hilarity ensues when a culture that is used to dealing with flurries gets something suited more to the East Coast. First: They don’t own any snowplows. The main roads are okay-ish because everyone is driving on them, but 2 days later the back alley is still full of snow.

Second: They don’t own snow shovels. They just get their brooms out and sweep at it.

Third: THEY USE MARBLE EVERYWHERE. SLIPPERY. I’ve fallen on my ass 4 times this week.

Still, they were decidedly non-chalant about it. I asked my co-teacher if they always get this much snow and she said “Yes, every year this much” and I wanted to call her a LIARYOULIAR. Once in a lifetime! Or once a week in any other cold climate

Yo La tengo – A Take Away Show – Part 1 from La Blogotheque on Vimeo.

I am bad at skiing, and that’s a story that will tell itself in due time, but first: At around 3:45 mark. Our Way To Fall is one of my very favorite songs, ever, +5. This is a particularly lovely rendition of it.